'My Child Is Great At School But Has Meltdowns At Home!' Signs Your Child Is High Masking

You’ve got a bright, seemingly well-adjusted child. They ace their exams, have a great group of friends, and always seem to have a smile on their face. But behind the scenes, you notice occasional outbursts, difficulty with transitions, or a sudden withdrawal from social activities. Could these be signs of high-masking? High-masking is a coping mechanism where individuals, often neurodivergent, suppress their true selves to fit into societal norms. While it can be a survival strategy, it can also lead to significant emotional and mental strain. It can be challenging to spot, but recognizing the signs can be the first step towards helping your child.

They are making a perfect student facadeYour child might consistently achieve top grades, participate actively in class, and be praised by teachers. However, behind this perfect image, they might be struggling with overwhelming anxiety, sensory overload, or other invisible challenges. This constant effort to maintain a flawless performance can be emotionally draining. They are becoming socially withdrawnDespite being popular at school, your child might prefer solitary activities at home. They may avoid social gatherings, family events, or even simple interactions with relatives, citing fatigue, lack of interest, or other reasons. This social withdrawal can be a sign of underlying emotional distress. They are having emotional outburstsSudden, intense emotional outbursts, often disproportionate to the situation, can be a red flag. These outbursts may manifest as tantrums, crying fits, or aggressive behavior. They might also withdraw completely, shutting down emotionally. They are having physical symptomsPhysical complaints like headaches, stomachaches, or fatigue can be manifestations of underlying emotional stress. These symptoms may worsen during periods of high stress, such as exams, social events, or transitions. They face difficulty with transitionsEven minor changes in routine can trigger anxiety and meltdowns. Your child might resist changes, become clingy, or experience difficulty adapting to new situations. This can be particularly challenging during school transitions or changes in family dynamics. They have bouts of intense interestsHyperfixations on specific topics or activities can be a coping mechanism for high-masking children. They may spend excessive amounts of time on these interests, neglecting other responsibilities or social interactions. This can be a way to escape from the demands of social life and self-regulation. They may be trying to achieve perfectionismA relentless pursuit of perfection can be a hallmark of high-masking. Your child may set unrealistic goals for themselves and become overly critical of their own performance. This can lead to significant stress, anxiety, and a fear of failure.